mood-less

i used to feel freaking energetic right after exams. be it just a test or a mid term. but, it wasn’t the same today. after completing my pharmaceutical chemistry mid term exam. i’m totally OUT. not in the swinging mood to go anywhere or do anything. just.. out of the ordinary me. feel so lifeless. adding to that, i had 2 hours of lecture on Pharmaeconomics! wth.. i dont even know the existence of such a word. Not enough of being bombarded with all the freaking similar drug names or extra-long enzyme names.. now comes business! which i’m really not interested in. i took health-related courses so that i can avoid any subjects related to business.. but heck.. in the 2nd sem of 3rd year, here i’m slapped on the face with economics!

markets + consumers + supplies + demands + interventions + policies + economic evaluations + analysis = HEADACHE!

i’m just plain tired and lifeless..

not in the mood for anything.

+ just now, was waken up from sleep for a presentation on contraception & STD..  -_-”  but have to! promised them for their seminar assignment to be an audience  :O 

tmr is sat, but gotta wake up at 6+ to go hiking in John Forest National Park…!

definitely time to sleep!  zzz

 

no one cares?

i wanna lock away my laptop.. make me stick in front of it for the whole day, doing nothing but watching drama and online!! argghh..ended up feeling guilty. wth!! i’m slacking like hell, so lazy to study and do the stuffs that i’m supposed to. there are so many stuffs to be due next week and still i’m here blogging. zk.. you’ll be dead!! on and off the msn.. was waiting for thou to come online now. on la… mana you? i want someone to talk to… cos i’m so darn bored!! i always tell ppl to come talk to me when they feel like it..but heck, how come i can’t find someone who i can really talk to? maybe i should use the same bait as pc; that’s to put your personal message as “no one cares“.. haha. it’s funny how someone could come asking you, “can i message you when i need someone to talk to?”  but somehow, i feel glad and happy that i’m the one that they’ll think of when they need someone to listen to them. tho i wouldnt promise that i’ll be the solution to your problem, but i can listen :) and i’m tight-lipped.. haha.

it’s almost the end of september. almost a month of spring. in another 2 months, i’ll have to move out from the room that i currently live in. i’m having headache house hunting. been searching but not very good results. either too old, too eerie, too far, too not safe, too expensive etc etc.. or probably i’m being too fussy? mmm..maybe. but i think i should be fussy. afterall, i’m going to stay there for quite some time. i wouldnt wanna move into a house that i wouldnt be comfortable in. that’s sooo not right! anyone has anything to reckon?

…the syndrome of being undecided hits me back on lately. just cant make up my mind for good and i’m very frustated with it!

…just chatted with alex. pitied him having to suffer the ‘panting’ of his neighbour every night. haha, i dont know whether to say you’re lucky or unlucky :)

..i’m anticipating “capricorn” but first.. this ” 稻 香 “

a smoky joker

a mysterious magician

end of week 7

here comes another weekend.. don’t know to be happy or sad about it. happy cos it’s week 7, drawing nearer to the end of the semester. but sad cos it marks that exams are very very near. and there are heaps of tests to come. whatever it is.. i’ll deal with it.

well.. just got back from badminton. and heck, no idea why the left scapula area was aching. probably cos i didnt warm up before playing. but who cares, i had a good game and it’s fun! gonna go again :)

round 1: yinyin & zk VS gyn & emily   >  WON

round 2: wenhan & zk VS gyn & anonymous   > LOSE

round 3: zk & chiang VS gyn & eric   >  WON

round 4: zk & gyn VS yinyin & emily   >  WON

round 5: zk & eric VS dewi & roy   >  WON

lol.. i guess the satisfaction of winning and having a good sweat out overshadowed the aching scapula. haha. randomly played..not serious and we had a good laugh. dont know we’re really playing or joking around :p plus, physically exhausted, cold and wet (from the out-of-nowhere rain)… pity?

well, apparently in WA, they have this “help” line called LifeLine, which provide counselling over the telephone. Interesting uh? be it problems regarding family and relationships, social, suicide, depression etc. Attention-grabbing cases mentioned by celine triggers my interest tho.. but too bad. apparently, they only recruit trained and certified personnels. absolutely, i’m not a good counsellor. zk is damn bad in consolling people. plus, i think i’m not that expressive.. and i might get too emotional at times :)

talking bout being emotional, i went for a hospital visit this week, a bout of the visits that i have to do this semester. it was very interesting! getting on-hands experience interviewing the patient was something really good. nevertheless, i did feel my contents in my stomach stirring when i see those patients lying on the bed, some being so helplessly, some being so lonely and some being so sick that they couldnt even wake up. i guess that’s why my mom never encourage me to work in a hospital and being brought up so, being a hospital pharmacist is an entry in the “roads not taken”. she always tells me the cons more than the pros..mm, i dont remember her saying a pro though :) but after the visit, it made me realised that the career is far more challenging and there are ample of cases. according to cherrie, they dealed with almost 60 patients/day, at peak.. 100patients/day. doing ward rounds, checking dosage regimens, possible drug-drug drug-food interactions. plus..there are more applications of the stuffs that we’ve studies in uni and the thing that captured my attention, there are more drugs supplied in the hospital which cannot be found in any community pharmacy!! lol.. more drugs more dangerous! i like!! there are also plenty of fields in the hospital pharmacy to choose from, ranging from extemporaneous preparations & cytotoxic preparations to dispensaries to clinical pharmacist and administrative work of a chief pharmacist!! lol.. i like also. hahaha very interesting! but the patient, of course, is the utmost priority. can i handle dealing with all the patients? you know, usually those patients in the hospital has chronic/serious/life-threatening debilitating disease/sickness/injuries which may include a lot of emotional factors. i will feel so sorry for them. i used to have the impression that seeing patients everyday may make myself a patient as well! don’t know who instilled that in me anyway.. But, i’m looking forward to my next round!

it was wanling’s bday last wed. instead of buying her a cake.. we made her one. successfully experimenting our coconut banana from white wings. we also bought some deco graffities to improve the elegance of the product! being a pharmacist, we’re always thought to present our extemporaneous products/preparations with elegance and so, that’s what we’re doing! i was the brain to the self made icing eh *proud* :) just egg white and sugar.. then vigorous stirring until it foams then freeze for few minutes! here’s some pics of the product :)

standard formula, correct ingredients, right quantities, no scheduled poison :)

 

140degress for 30minutes in a fan-forced oven .. not enough to be sterile :p

 

added excipient: denatured protein of egg white + sugar (self made icing)

 

detailed additions! no shaky hands!!

 

voila.. the final product! :)

 

the burfdey girl!!

 

—

checking the time, it’s 9.48pm and heck i’m still here blogging. i’m supposed to study now! pharmaceutical chemistry mid term soon. it’ll be mid-autumn (should be mid-“spring” here) festival tomorrow so ppl in the house plan to celebrate it, lit the lanterns, with some mooncakes and hot tea outside the house with the companion of the dear moon. i hope it’ll be huge but i guess, it wouldnt be as huge as the one i saw last time. hopefully it’ll not rain tomorrow. been raining a lot lately.. cold! is it spring yet?? or not?! hmmm…

 

try-out of the newly bought 50c 24pcs colour pencils :)

.. a date with .::benny::. tomorrow  :)

 

 

安静

只剩下钢琴陪我谈了一天
睡着的大提琴安静的旧旧的
我想你已表现的非常明白
我懂我也知道你没有舍不得
你说你也会难过我不相信
牵着你陪着我也只是曾经
希望他是真的比我还要爱你
我才会逼自己离开
你要我说多难堪我根本不想分开
为什么还要我用微笑来带过
我没有这种天份包容你也接受他
不用担心的太多我会一直好好过
你已经远远离开我也会慢慢走开
为什么我连分开都迁就着你
我真的没有天份安静的没这么快
我会学着放弃你是因为我太爱你

 

—

missing?

no news = good news ?

at times, maybe yes.

what happened?

where?

how?

should i pick it up?

what a day

definitely a day..

to screw up even my last formulation! heck!! firstly, the cream i made doesn’t form. quickly, quietly i made a change

for the second time, it’s not forming as well! looks like a tub of oily splat which screwed up whenever i tried to made up to weight with purified water.

i went up to margaret and ask her to take a look at it. being kind enough, which she has always been.. she tried tenth of ways but all in vail. it’s still not forming. the clock kept on ticking..1 hour left. if it doesn’t form still, i’m gonna bid goodbye to a part of my assessments.

finally decided to change the whole stupid formula and make another one. glad that it finally looks like a cream!

still i’m not sure why i’m being so “off” today in the lab..

mistaken rosemary oil = rose oil.. resulting a spiking rosemary smell in the cream. 

broke glasswares.. :(

left my calculator n susdp in the room

useless pre-written write up and labels

…

…

…

…

i’m tired

finally

a counselling and a mid semester pharmaceutics test.. finally, i can have a break.

anticipated the counselling test for quite some time.. afterall, it’s the first formal counselling i had with my “patient”. prior to this session, i’ve “swallowed” all the 8 consumer medication information booklets; which includes Canesten, Brenda, Estraderm, Loceryl, Seretide, Spiriva, Nitrolingual and Xenical. Having said that, to memorise all the indication, mechanism of action, application method and side effects were somehow suffocating. furthermore, i have not really get my hands on the devices before. though it was just 15 minutes.. it feels like ages!

today, it’s pharmaceutics mid sem test. and heck.. i never likes mcq! instead, the 6 marks saq was a good one.

hate hate hate mcq!!! it always gets my my neurons twisted n tangled!!! arghh… but now, hopefully all would be well..

what i need now is a break. a break!

hmm… i want my doggies now! i miss them soo much. i wanna play with them, i wanna carry them, i wanna hug them! lucky!!! milkshake!!!

i want a breath of fresh air! . . .badminton!! here i come..